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| Happy dance! |
(1) It is time for him to learn + socialize.
(2) The duration and timing is just nice.
(3) Mummy's mummy was quite insistent, as it is Buddhist-run.
(4) Both Mummy and Grandma believe that reason no.3 will lead to good teaching of values for the boy.
(5) Also, constant exposure and contact with the Venerables there will plant good Buddhistic seeds in him.
(6) Travelling to and fro is convenient and fast, important for keeping to meals and naps.
Boyboy enjoys it because:
(1) He gets to sing and dance.
(2) All the adults know and chat with him.
(3) He likes the teachers.
(4) He likes the Venerables who simply luuuuuuurve him.
(5) He is used to his classmates.
But.... Mummy has been feeling quite conflicted for some time about this school.
Because of:
(1) Communication
(2) Safety
(3) Human traffic
(4) Overloading
Communication
Firstly, and mainly, is that the school's communication with parents is terrible! Or rather, non-existent. There is a parent-communication notebook in each kid's bag, but nothing is written except for notification of day-off on school holidays.
When I try to catch the teachers after school to talk to them, I get joking, flippant responses, as though we are chatting in the market. Is it because this is a sua-teng school??? Or maybe I need to talk to them with a black face before they take me seriously.
Buay-song incident 1
They asked my boy to pose for a concert poster. It is only through that that I found out the kids will be involved in the concert in October. Likewise, all the other parents only found out when the poster was put up around the temple. No official notification? Doesn't the school need to seek the parents' buy-in for their children's participation?
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| Poster at entrance of temple. |
And worst of all, Hubby and I found out later that our boy's image was printed on badges and freely given out during the temple's Vesak Day activities. Hello?!?!!? At least seek our permission? Maybe the temple felt that since we're ok with taking the photo, they have the right to use it as they like.
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| The offending badge. Teacher still gave it to us for souvenir without realising. |
I feel VERY VERY uncomfortable that my boy's image is in the possession of any 阿猫阿狗.
From my past job, I know how important model-release permission is. If we are nasty, we can make them remove his image from everything now. But unfortunately, the boy's parents are such walkovers sigh.
Buay-song incident 2
During the June holidays they organised an excursion to a farm, inclusive of lunch. It was supposed to be a short 2-hr trip, but Hubby and I opted Boyboy out because we noticed they don't have an efficient hand-cleaning practice. The kids can be eating biscuits and licking their paint-covered fingers during class. The prospect of our boy licking his animal-covered fingers freaked us out.
The teachers kept calling to convince us, so ok, we gave chance. Then the day before they SMSed a reminder with an extended time to 4 hrs. No "pls note that the time has been changed" message, just a different pick-up time that parents will not notice if they are not careful.
We pulled Boyboy out as the time overlapped a lot with his nap and he would be cranky and have a bad sense of balance... we didn't trust them to be able to watch each and every kid. Not to mention he might fall asleep on the bus back, sitting unconscious without seatbelts!
Wah, when school re-opened the teacher suan-ed me about wasting their insurance money and all the paperwork they rushed out for my boy. I just gave a tight smile. 以和为贵， 以和为贵... Can you imagine if we were other parents who had already paid the $15, then have the time changed without their consent? One such kid had to pull out cos of the timing and lose his money. BOO!!!!
Buay-song incident 3
Boyboy has a long-time problem of bad sleep as he is a very light sleeper. So he is usually lethargic in the mornings from sleeping badly or waking up too early at 6am. Otherwise he actually goes back to sleep at 6am and wakes at 8am, when he is not ready for breakfast yet.
So almost every day he needs to take a cereal bar during teabreak to fill his stomach. I've asked the teachers about it and they said ok, but they keep forgetting to give him his lunchbox even after I remind every morning. Is it due to diffused responsibility?
So my boy ends up eating their provided snack, which is usually some heaty chocolate biscuit or super artificial colour/flavouring/preservatives cake like London Choco Roll or the Apollo type. Once they even fed the kids that old-skool chocolate wafer bar that we used to eat!
And all this after I buy organic, healthy whole-grain snacks for my boy. Angry leh. Hubby said I should make a big "GIVE ME MY LUNCHBOX" sign and hang it on Boyboy's neck when I drop him off. Haha, I wish!
Buay-song incident 4
Also, there have been rumours going around from different sources that the school plans to shift out of the temple to a HDB void deck. I have been trying to clarify with the teachers but they just laugh and dismiss it. Getting on my nerves!
Safety
My boy has been literally run down by his classmates twice. Kicked by the culprit in the 1st incident, and floored by the 2nd one. I've seen another boy hitting him on the head a few times in a row with a big book. It is always the same few naughty children.
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| Swell from running-headbutt. |
I know because these happened during dismissal time when the parents have arrived. Do they happen in class too without our knowledge?
I wonder if a victim's parents will even be informed if there are no obvious wounds. What more the culprit's parents. How can I be reassured that my boy is being taken care of?
I know as Buddhists, they believe in 爱的教育 and also the Montessori principle of guiding the child to understand on his own. But there still has to be some form of firm guidance right?
Human Traffic
The temple is a public place. The playgroup often has activities in other parts of the temple outside of the classroom, where anyone can have access. Also, volunteers come in and out of the classroom to help out, and the kids get accustomed to welcome anyone with open arms and full trust.
This makes me very worried about how Boyboy will learn to distinguish when it is safe to leave with someone other than his family. Already in lifts and shopping malls, he makes the first move to talk to or shake hands with stranger adults.
Should I remove him from such a situation before it gets ingrained?
Overloading
When my boy started out in the playgroup, the number of children was about 12, to 3 teachers and 2 volunteers. That was a great ratio!
But as they started to accept more children, the ration has gone down. Now there are about 19 children with the same teachers. 19 children enclosed in a classroom the size of 3 HDB bedrooms!
One really bad decision I feel, is them agreeing to take in children who are obviously not mature enough to handle being away from their parents. There are currently two 18-mth-olds who cry from the time they are handed over, until pickup time. And all this while, they have to be carried by a teacher / volunteer. This greatly diminishes the effectiveness of the lessons already.
Not to mention that they are howling away the whole time. Not good for mental health of the other kids! Sometimes Boyboy can go to school with a cheery mood but start to cry when he sees them >:( So sometimes he is already in school, but reluctant to go to class.
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| Trying to procrastinate. |
Many times I drop him off and peek into the class, only to see him standing alone at the side, watching and looking lost. No teacher to welcome him into on-going activities because they are pre-occupied. At such times I feel so bad for him... mostly he ends up playing alone. Is there any point in sending him there?
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| Drawing alone until a volunteer comes to chat. |
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| Only plays when Mummy cheers him on :( |
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As of now, Boyboy is still in this playgroup because:
(1) He is so used to his classmates, teachers and Venerables
(2) Mummy has not been able to find another playgroup which is short enough, near enough, or good enough in terms of their Montessori activities.
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| 猴子偷桃 with his best friend! |
Boyboy has more or less settled into this school environment, I worry about pulling him out and forcing him to re-adjust to a new one.
How? Any advice from more experienced parents? :(
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